I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize