Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
