it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
