Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize
