I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize