I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
