They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
