i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
