I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
