thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
i out mim tonsoeep
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
