gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
thus making me awesome and them whores
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
