Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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