I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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