Already got asked if we're dating
Plan B is the new Plan A
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Holy sore nipples Batman
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
