ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize