who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
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