why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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