Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize
