So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
