Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize