I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
