her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
She announced her abortion via fbk
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I have grass duct taped all over my body
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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