You're so nebulous sometimes
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
