feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
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