I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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