I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
