Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i drank out of a bidet.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
