are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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