I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
birth control should be required to get into college
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
