____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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