Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
