Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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