don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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