Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
