So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Randomize