You're completely useless in the revolution.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize