just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
