This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
