Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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