forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
