capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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