i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
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