Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
