Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
