The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
