So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
