OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
