Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
