He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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