he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Mom said you looked used
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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